2 halves of a whole

Today, I'd like to talk about my boyfriend.

My boyfriend is just about the best (and most amazing) gift life has ever granted to me. When I was down, he was there. When I wanted something for myself, he'd help me with it. When I blogged about him in the past, he'd shyly tell me that it made him blush. And when he told me that, it made me blush too.

We've been together for almost 6 years now. That is about 30% of my life. I've known him and been together with him for about 30% of our lives. It's not a lot, but no one is to say that it's little too.

What I can say about us is that we are 2 vastly different people put together and moulded together to form what people call love. But I think sometimes that I don't only just love him, I admire and adore him. To me, he's sometimes what I'd call perfection. But he also drives me nuts... He's the one person whom I've trusted everything to and has the ability to destroy me with his words. He's the one person I've decided to give up my vulnerability to.

I count on him... Yet sometimes I feel like I love him so much I've to push him away. In fact, I know for fact that I push him away more than I've ever pushed anyone away. I've rejected him for countless times for no reason at all. And he doesn't know. He doesn't have to know.

I remember there was this time when we were 15 I think that he went to a camp only to come back with severe food poisoning. I didn't hear from him for a long time and when I finally did, I was worried sick about him. When he came back, I went to his house to see him. He passed me a toy that wailed "I love you" in a squeaky voice when you pressed its tummy. He was pale and more tired that I remember him looking. He told me later on that his food poisoning made him feel absolutely shitty and he thought he was going to die... But he wouldn't die because he knew I depended my life on his and that he had to come back to see me... To take care of me.

And for as long as I remember...

No matter what emotional hurt he inflicts upon me sometimes, he's always been there to protect my heart at the very least...

I cannot remember what pushed me to write this entry in the first place. I don't know why I decided it'll be a good idea to blog about the closest topic to my heart. But I think this will be my favorite blog entry for a long long while. Just like how he's one of my favorite person in the world and my favorite topic to ever talk about.

Chase your dreams.

Been awhile again.

I made a major decision to take that leap of faith the other day. I've decided to fully focus my efforts on the business and take a gap year first before I jump onto the university wagon. Although I fully understand the risks of failing my business and losing an entire year of my youth, I feel like I have to do this. I don't want to grow to regret any of my decisions in the future... And losing a year of my youth is far less painful than losing the opportunity to carry out my dreams.

I want to make Thursday Tales successful. I will make Thursday Tales, myself and my entire team successful within the next 5 years. I will. Trust me, watch me. It will happen.

My heart feels like it's been through a lot of emotional turmoil. It feels tired and exhausted and in pain. I still have a lot of personal issues to deal with...

It is extremely, extremely exhausting.

But I think one of the best things I've learned from this entire ordeal is to really, really follow your heart and trust it. Your brains might tell you the best thing you should do but your heart tells you the things that will make you happy. And my personal philosophy in life is that if you're not happy and that you're regretting every single decision you're making, then you've not lived before.

♥